Happy Birthday, Marcy

Today would have been my daughter Marcy’s 48^th birthday. It is so hard to believe that she was born so long ago (and that I am that old!). Of course, she will be 27-years-old forever. She died on March 2, 1994, a lifetime ago in my eyes. Her father, my first husband, died four years ago in 2010. That is it; there are no siblings on any side of our family, and no aunts or uncles. A few cousins, but I am only friendly with one of them.

Fortunately, I am very close to my daughter’s best friend and always have been. She is like a second daughter to me, and I know how much she misses Marcy and always will. Her life gives me an indication of what Marcy’s would have been like with a husband and children. They were married only 4 months apart and had many hopes, dreams and plans for their lives together, which were ripped apart that March day. 

Marcy’s friend now has three children to whom she has bestowed me with two honors. The first is that I am their godmother and the other is that her daughter is named Marcy after my daughter.

When I met my future husband in 2003, I learned from him that he, also, has one daughter and both his daughter and my daughter were born on the same month and day. Coincidence? No, I believe it was something more, particularly after I got to know her and realized how alike the two girls were in thought, deed and actions.

My husband’s daughter now has a 2 ½ year old son. It has been so joyful to know what it is like to have a grandson, something I thought I’d never be able to imagine. His middle name is after Marcy; she just dropped the “y” when naming him.

Can I say that good can come out of tragedy? Certainly, I can. I’ve had some very glorious moments in my new normal since Marcy died. But it will never be the same without her. I will always miss her terribly and a piece of my heart will always be missing. I have some wonderful memories to always treasure tucked way down inside me. I love when other people mention her name; it gives me a warm feeling, and I realize she will never be forgotten completely.

Happy 48^th birthday, my darling daughter.